Collection of history papers from a freshman colle
The following was taken without permission from The
Wilson Quarterly, which is sort of a Reader's Digest
for intelligent people. The article was assembled from
papers submitted by freshmen history students at a
Canadian university. The lead-in the the article as
published in The Wilson Quarterly speculated that the
long-suffering professor who originally assembled this
work did it as an act of vengeance. As you read it,
consider the possibility that the person or people with
whom you share an office may be among the students who
unknowingly contributed to this article. All mis-
spellings are from the original.
History, as we know, is always bias, because human
beings have to be studied by other human beings, not by
independent observers of another species.
During the Middle Ages, everbody was middle aged.
Church and state were co-operatic. Middle Evil society was
made up of monks, lords and surfs. It is unfortunate that
we do not have a medivel European laid out on a table before
us, ready for dissection. After a revival of infantile com-
merce slowly creeped into Europe, merchants appeared. Some
were sitters and some were drifters. They roamed from town
to town exposing themselves and organized big fairies in the
countryside. Mideval people were violent. Murder during
this period was nothing. Everybody killed someone. England
fought numerously for land in France and ended up wining and
losing. The Crusades were a series of military expaditions
made by Christians seeking to free the holy land (the "Home
Town" of Christ) from the Islams.
In the 1400 hundreds most Englishmen were perpendicu-
lar. A class of yeowls arose. Finally, Europe caught the
Black Death. The bubonic plague is a social disease in that
it can be transmitted by intercourse and other etceteras.
It was spread from port to port by inflected rats. Victims
of the Black Death grew boobs on their necks. The plague
also helped the emergence of the English language as the
national language of England, France and Italy.
The Middle Ages slimpared to a halt. The renasence
bolted in from the blue. Life reeked with joy. Italy
became robust, and more individuals felt the value of the
human being. Italy, of course, was much closer to the rest
of the world, thanks to northern Europe. Man was deter-
mined to civilise himself and his brothers, even if heads
had to roll! It became sheik to be educated. Art was on a
more associated level. Europe was full of incredable
churches with great art bulging out their doors. Renais-
sance merchants were beautiful and almost lifelike.
The Reformation happened when German nobles resented
the idea that tithes were going to Papal France or the Pope
thus enriching Catholic coiffures. Traditions had become
oppressive so they too were crushed in the wake of man's
quest for ressurection above the not-just-social beast he
had become. An angry Martin Luther nailed 95 theocrats to a
church door. Theologically, Luthar was into reorientation
mutation. Calvinism was the most convenient religion since
the days of the ancients. Anabaptist services tended to be
migratory. The Popes, of course, were usually Catholic.
Monks went right on seeing themselves as worms. The last
Jesuit priest died in the 19th century.
After the refirmation were wars both foreign and infer-
nal. If the Spanish could gain the Netherlands they would
have a stronghold throughout northern Europe, which would
include their posetions in Italy, Burgangy, central Europe
and India thus serrounding France. The German Emperor's
lower passage was blocked by the French for years and years.
Louis XIV became King of the Sun. He gave the people
food and artillery.If he didn't like someone, he sent them
to the gallows to row for the rest of their lives. Vauban
was the royal minister of flirtation. In Russia the 17th
century was known as the time of the bounding of the serfs.
Russian nobles wore clothes only to humour Peter the Great.
Peter filled his government with accidental people and built
a new capital near the European boarder. Orthodox priests
became government antennae.
The enlightenment was a reasonable time. Voltare wrote
a book called Candy that got him into trouble with Frederick
the Great. Philosophers were unknown yet, and the fundamen-
tal stake was one of religious toleration slightly confused
with defeatism. France was in a very serious state. Taxa-
tion was a great drain on the state budget. The French
revolution was accomplished before it happened. The revolu-
tion evolved through monarchial, republican and tolarian
phases until it catapulted into Napoleon. Napoleon was ill
with bladder problems and was very tense and unrestrained.
History, a record of things left behind by past genera-
tions, started in 1815. Throughout the comparatively redi-
cal years 1815-1870 the western European continent was
undergoing a Rampant period of economic modification.
Industrialization was precipitating in England. Problems
were so complexicated in Paris, out of a city population of
one million people, two million able bodies were on the
Great Britain, the USA and other European countrys had
demicratic leanings. The middle class was tired and needed
a rest. The old order could see the lid holding down new
ideas beginning to shake. Among the goals of the chartists
were universal suferage and an anal parliment. Voting was
to be done by ballad.
A new time zone of national unification roared over the
horizon. Founder of the new Italy was Cavour, an intelli-
gent Sardine from the north. Nationalism aided Itally
because nationalisn is the growth of an army. We can see
that nationalism succeeded for Itally because of France's
big army. Napoleon III-IV mounted the French thrown. One
thinks of Napoleon III as a live extension of the late, but
great, Napoleon. Here too was the new Germany: loud, bold,
vulgar and full of reality.
Culture fomented from Europe's tip to its top. Richard
Strauss, who was violent but methodical like his wife made
him, plunged into vicious and perverse plays. Dramatized
were adventures in seduction and abortion. Music reeked
with reality. Wagner was master of music, and people did
not forget his contribution. When he died, they labeled his
seat "historical". Other countries had their own artists.
France had Chekhov.
World War I broke out around 1912-1914. Germany was on
one side of France and Russia was on the other. At war peo-
ple get killed and then they aren't people any more, but
friends. Peace was proclaimed at Versigh, which was
attended by George Loid, Primal Minister of England.
President Wilson arrived with 14 pointers. In 1937 Lenin
revolted Russia. Communism raged among the peasants, and
the civil war "team colours" were red and white.
Germany was displaced after WWI. This gave rise to
Hitler. Germany was morbidly overexcited and unbalanced.
Berlin became the decadent capital where all forms of sexual
deprivations were practised. A huge anti-semantic movement
arose. Attractive slogans like "death to all Jews" were
used by governmental groups. Hitler remilitarized the Rine-
land over a squirmish between Germany and France. The
appeasers were blinded by the great red of the Soviets.
Moosealini rested his foundations on eight million bayonets
and invaded Hi Lee Salasy. Germany invaded Poland, France
invaded Belgium, and Russia invaded everybody. War
screeched to an end when a nukuleer explosion was dropped on
Heroshima. A whole generation had been wipe out in two
world wars, and the forlorne families were left to pick up
According to Fromm, individuation began historically in
medieval times. This was a period of small childhood.
There is increasing experience as adolescence experiences
its life development. The last stage is us.
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